Nicole Mary Milligan
Interview Transcription:
SPEAKERS
Molly Joyce, Nicole Mary Milligan
Molly Joyce 00:07
So the first question is, what is resilience for you?
Nicole Mary Milligan 00:17
I guess resilience is really a bold and brave act, you know, that you that you work in spite of it all, that there's a certain courageous streak to you, and you won't give up. And I think that when I hear the word resilience, it really does remind me of the fact that there's so much in the world that pushes down on you. And so you have to push it away. But you have to do it gently. And you have to do it elegantly. And you have to do it in a way that seems effortless. Because you can't be that person who allows the weight of resilience, which is more than air, and more than gravity, and, and deep. Deeper than any ocean, you can't let resilience, you know, you overcome you the act of being resilient, you can't let that overcome you, you can't really let that overcome you at all. And even the word when you hear it, you think, Oh, that's right. Life is hard. You know, this is hard. This is very hard to get up in the morning, it's very hard to ignore what what makes too lopsided in my case, to ignore that pain, and to ignore that, the way people sometimes look at you and just push past it. So even the word has a particular weight that is damaging, because it just suggests that you have to be resilient. I would rather look at it as being buoyant. I guess, you know, the idea of how do you see the word buoyant? You know, because I think that's what we need. We need a certain grace, you know, and we need a buoyancy, you know, when did you be able to float through the world? And it's issues.
Molly Joyce 02:29
That's great. Thank you. And the second question is, what is isolation for you?
Nicole Mary Milligan 02:41
Isolation is a very interesting word. Because it suggests somehow, that you need to be in the room with someone else. I'm not sure we're ever isolated. I know that with COVID. We were all in our compartments, but our heart and our spirit, and our very being was in the world. You know, the art that you make the people you touch, you know, the memory of you is always in the world, you're never really isolated. You know, in many ways, we're all interconnected in this web of breath and sound. And life, just the pure life force. You know. So when we think of ourselves as isolated, it seems like an odd word, I guess I have trouble with words like this, because we're never really isolated. You know, if you think about it, you live within me, and I live within you, and we all live within each other's being every day of the week, you know, every moment, even when we're asleep, we're not isolated, because the memory of of, of a touch, or the memory of your great grandmother, or the memory of it all seeps through, we're all you know, our bodies are electric, of course, here there is that electricity to us, you know, that, that is atomic level sort of thing. So we're never really, in what and then in that sense, we're isolated because we can't actually touch anyone, actually, you know, because of the, the way that that that we've been chosen to be put together somehow. But at the same time, you know, we're never really isolated. We're always in our spirits in the world.
Molly Joyce 04:32
Definitely thank you, and kind of the opposite of that, what is connection for you?
Nicole Mary Milligan 04:41
I think connection is waking up every morning and saying, "what's today, what is the moment of today?" You know, sometimes connection is when you meet someone, and there's that electricity, and that's how we traditionally sort of think of connection But the idea of just even watching people go by on the street, I live on a very busy street. And it's very interesting to see all the people who pass my door. And some of them don't see me, and some of them do. And some of them, we'll pass my door. And some of them, you know, are being carried past my door. And sometimes, some of them are in great celebration past my door, but the idea of our spirits connecting, and, again, that electricity, of who we are, and our neutrons and our atoms all buzzing around, and that we are always connected, we always buzz with that we're always sort of alive with that, even in our sorrow, you know, even in the darkness of the moment, there is that, that sense of, of the feeling of the world. And so, you know, sometimes you might be in your house, and you might not be out in the world, but you can still feel connected, whether it be just in the sound around you, you know, it's it's all, we're all connected to everything in many ways, and you're never really alone, which is good. Sometimes it's quieter, you know, when you're actually in a room and there's no one around or you're in a residency or in the top of a mountain, or you're in Ireland, where we have our other studio, and you're lying on the grass, and the stars are so close to you, you feel like you can actually reach up and touch them. And you feel like you're the only person who exists in the world. And in that very moment, you realize how connected you are to everything. The stars, the air, that the we act that's crawling up your neck. It's, it's all you and this world, and it's just all one.
Molly Joyce 07:02
I really love that, especially think about the sound or variance in that. And then the last question is, what is darkness for you?
Nicole Mary Milligan 07:17
I think darkness is a very calming thing, if you're talking about at night, and you just lie there and the absence of light. But I think darkness really is an acceptance. If you think about it metaphorically, instead of physically, it's an acceptance, it's acceptance of the fact that fires do fade. You know, and that you need the darkness in order to have the light. No, a lot of times people talk about the dark times in their life, you know, and it's so interesting, because in many ways, darkness is your friend. You need to sleep. You need to be quiet. You need to have calmness that darkness brings. Do you ever wonder why darkness calms you? If you think about it, when you're in a place and there's bright lights, I know and your mind is going whoa, what's going on. And your mind is racing and racing if you've had way too much coffee. But when you walk into a dark, cool room, suddenly you're calm. And so when when you think about darkness, about a push away from that dark night, and fight against. The, you know, it's it's so interesting, because why would you darkness and even feeling that darkness inside of you is part of the calming and part of the rebirth and part of the recharging. And it might not be your rebirth. You know, I think I think at the end of time, you know, you do there is a particular darkness that comes over you, you know, the calms you once more. You know, and that might be the final calming. But when it does, there is that sense of rebirth. You know because your last breath is someone's first because your last moment or thought is someone's first. You know it's all there in that cycle of darkness, which makes us appreciate the light so much. You know, the joy of light, but at the same time there's a great joy and just the quiet solemnity of darkness.